“Every election is determined by the people who show up.” –Larry J. Sabato
Well, I guess if you want to get technical it is, “Speak now or hold your peace for the next four years.” It’s election season, ladies and gentleman. Now, I am not going to get wrapped up in a debate on who you should vote for (though I could), but I am going to state the importance that you vote. We are given the opportunity to make our voice heard, and if you give up that right during election season, you have also given up the right for the next four years. I have had many conversations with people who complain about the way our nation is led, and when asked if they voted in the last election they quickly respond no and chuckle at the absurdity of the question. If you so choose to silence yourself for one reason or another, you no longer have the right to complain about who is elected. You surrendered your right. For those who say they are “not into politics” and that is the reason why you don’t want to vote… Do you have no opinion on equal rights, gun control, reproductive rights, foreign policy, health care, immigration, education, social security, the environment? Just to name a few. Politics is not just election season and deciding who is our next president. Politics is how we interact with the world around us. It is how we interact with people at home, it dictates our rights, and allows us to dictate our leader. Politics is so much more than November 8, 2016. For those who say their vote “doesn’t matter” and that is the reason why you don’t want to vote… The voters in the Brexit decision thought their vote didn’t matter either. Then when the verdict was made, people regretted their vote and were shocked to find out that their voice was heard through their vote. Your vote is your voice; I cannot stress that enough. Do not silence yourself. For those who say this election is “choosing between the lesser of two evils” and that is the reason you don’t want to vote…That may be true, but you not voting doesn’t “stick it to the man” or show your aggravation towards the situation. It just silences you. It doesn’t enact change. Change happens because people do things. Not voting is not showing them, it’s just not showing up. You are doing nothing. If nothing else, voting at least gives you the right to complain if you do not agree with the newly elected official. Remember, if you don’t vote, you chose to silence yourself. So, shut up. No complaining from you. Everyone, the right to vote is a privilege whether you believe it or not. It wasn’t just handed to us. Generations of people struggled for this right, and other parts of the world are still fighting for it. So, the fact that you don’t want to take the time to educate yourself on the topics or wait in lines on the day of the polls is not an excuse to not vote. It’s pure laziness. Do not give up your voice. Higher turnout makes our democracy more representative. Show up. Be a part of that representation. In order to vote, you must register. People, registration ends in some states in a matter of days. If you do not register, your voice is gone. Do not silence yourself. Register. Vote. Show up. Speak your mind. Always, Molly
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“Success isn’t a result of spontaneous combustion. You must set yourself on fire.”
– Arnold H. Glasow I am currently in the process of setting myself on fire (cue Alicia Keys). As painful as that sounds, and sometimes seems, it’s a good fire. A fire of change, renewal, and growth. This is certainly the most challenging semester in graduate school. For me at least. With increased clinic hours, class work, and continuous studying for the test that will determine if I can be a clinician, it’s been a busy semester thus far. One of my professors said that in graduate school “we are all currently in a high pressure cooker for a lifetime of advancement.” It is because of this I say bring on the flames. These flames light the pathway for the rest of our lives in a fantastic career. Sure, I may be ready to be done with the classroom theoretical knowledge and want to get to the application part of it all, but I need to respect the journey. And trust me, I do. I am well aware that there is so much that I still do not know; however, I am more of a learn-by-doing person, so I want to get out there and start doing. Octavia Butler once said, “In order to rise from its own ashes, a Phoenix first must burn.” I know that this hard work and dream chasing may not be easy, but it is absolutely, undoubtedly worth it. I need to remember this fact when I am not in the mood to go to class or clinic or the library and would rather have a day off watching Netflix and not putting on pants. I need to remind myself how lucky I am to be in the one percent of the world that gets to receive a higher education. It is not a have to situation, but instead it is a get to situation. Can you say blessed? I can almost taste the celebratory beer I will drink at graduation. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel, and it is getting brighter and brighter every day. Ladies in my cohort, we are so close. We just have (get to have) a little bit longer in the classroom. Then we will be in the real world practicing what we have spent the last several years learning. This fact is both terrifying and exciting. It’s frisson. For those who would like to gain a vocab word, frisson is the place where thrill and fear meet. It’s a much better word than the combinations I was trying to come up with myself (terrifiting or exhilarary). So, like Fawkes, I will rise. I will rise from the late nights and early mornings spent studying for the Praxis. I will rise from the countless hours working on research and homework. I will rise from the libraries that I have considered my second home. I will rise from the years of academia leading up to my career. I will rise from the ashes from setting myself on fire. While I won’t be a mythological bird, I will be a Speech-Pathologist, and that is enough for me. Okay, okay, it would be really awesome to be a mythological anything, especially from Harry Potter. As for now, I’m taking life advice from the music icon, Usher, and I just gotta let it burn. Always, Molly "What good is living the life you've been given if all you do is stand in one place?" - Lord Huron9/7/2016 I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright no matter how grey the day may appear.
I wish you enough rain to appreciate the sun even more. I wish you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive and everlasting. I wish you enough pain so that even the smallest of joys in life may appear bigger. I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting. I wish you enough loss to appreciate all that you possess. I wish you enough hellos to get you through the final good-bye. - Anonymous I wish you all enough. Always, Molly “One day I will find the right words, and they will be simple.” – Jack Kerouac
I firmly believe that I have chosen the best career. Okay, that is super subjective. Here’s an addendum: I firmly believe that I have chosen the best career for me. I am finishing up my third semester in graduate school now to become a Speech-Language Pathologist, and this semester, more than others, has reaffirmed that I have chosen the right career path. This semester I had the pleasure of doing my internship at the new Brooks Rehabilitation Aphasia Center. Most of you are probably wondering what in the world aphasia is. I am going to explain it some in this post, but I challenge you to read about it more yourself, because we need to increase awareness. Aphasia is a communication disorder that affects an individual’s language, not their intellect, usually caused by a stroke or traumatic brain injury. Their language can be affected in areas of expression, comprehension, reading, and writing; however, they are still as intelligent as they were before they had aphasia. That is extremely important to remember. These individuals know what they are trying to say, but sometimes the words just don’t come out right. Sometimes the words might not go in right, and they have a hard time understanding. One more time, just to make sure it’s clear, this is a problem with language, not intellect. Aphasia is hard to understand because it cannot be seen. Everyone understands a broken bone because there is physical evidence of the break. We can see it. With limited use in a cast, it will most likely heal. That is not the way it is for aphasia. Instead, the brain’s healing is a response to its use. This is based on the idea of experience-based plasticity. The more experiences you have (in this case talking), the more your brain will wire and rewire for that exact function. So, everyday at the Aphasia Center when we talked, we were rewiring neural connections. How cool is that? When I sat down to write about what my time at the Aphasia Center with all the wonderful people I got to be with meant to me, I found that I was at a loss for words. Imagine that. Sometimes when I want to write about something that is near and dear to my heart, I get nervous that I will not do it justice, and I lose my words. But, it’s better to try and fail rather than not try at all, I suppose. So, here I go... In the past three months that I have been here, while fully functioning as a human sponge, I learned so incredibly much from each member, and the SLPs that I had the pleasure of working with. I am so appreciative to them all for their help in my pursuit to become the best Speech-Language Pathologist I can be. Through the human-sponge absorption process, I learned more in my time at the center than textbooks and classes could ever teach me. I also learned a lot more about life than I expected. Here are just a few examples of some things I have learned from the members: People with aphasia have taught me more about…
Selfishly, I wish my time at the Aphasia Center was not over. Goodbyes are never easy for me. While I am sad that my time somehow passed me in the blink of an eye, I am also so appreciative for the time I got to spend with all of the amazing people I met. Every member has helped me get closer to my goal in life: to have an ugly heart. I know, I know, wanting an ugly heart sounds pretty bad. However, if you have not read my past blog that explains it, I will explain. You want an ugly heart because it means that you have lived. Truly lived. You’ve loved and lost, you’ve given part of your heart to people and places, you have had your heart broken to be put back together, sometimes not fully, with the help of God, family, friends, and yourself. An ugly heart is mismatched with pieces of other people’s hearts that they have given you as well. An ugly heart symbolizes a life lived. Everyone I met at the Aphasia Center definitely made my heart uglier, and I cannot thank them enough for it. A piece of my heart will always be attached to that place. Words can only do so much when trying to express my passion for this community, and my desire to learn more and do more. I am so excited for what my future holds in this career. I have just learned that my next internship will be at the Mayo Clinic, and am excited for the new adventure that awaits! Stay tuned… Always, Molly If you would like to learn more about aphasia, or want to help spread awareness, check out these links!
“I am interested in people who swim in the deep end. I want to have conversations about real things. I’m tired of talking about movies and gossiping about friends. Life is crunchy and complicated and all the more delicious.” - Amy Poehler
I am an extroverted introvert, and my girl Amy’s words really hit home for me. Part of what that means is I enjoy socializing, in doses, but I still absolutely need my alone time. Also, it means that I think small talk is the worst. To be honest, I don’t care about the weather, or the “finethankshowareyou” conversations. I cherish the moments I can have with people I love, especially in one-on-one settings. I love talking about things that matter. It is those close heart-to-heart conversations when you can really see another person, and really let another person see you. The vulnerability in that is endearing, and I’m so thankful that I have people in my life that I can have deep, meaningful conversations with, where my heart is wide open and only ever feel supported and loved. Even when we don’t agree. I hope my loved ones feel the same way when they are talking to me. Speaking of opening up and letting someone see you…I am obsessed with the human body and all of its intricacies. Well, here’s an anatomical phenomenon: We never truly see ourselves. It is biologically impossible. All we ever see are our reflections. When we look at something, it passes through our eyes and actually gets flipped upside down, and then your brain processes it and puts it back to its original state, and we see what we are looking at. Generally speaking, and blurry vision aside, our eyes do this flawlessly, and we see the world the way it is displayed. Let’s just take a second and marvel at the fact that everything you look at is flipped upside down, processed, and seen normally without you even being aware. The brain is so cool. However, sometimes I think the reflection of ourselves that we see gets flipped by our eyes, in the same way as everything else, but then when it gets to our brain, it doesn’t quite arrange itself in the correct way. Looking at other people, you can see them in a different way and see their strengths, their abilities, and what makes them beautiful and special. However, like I said, all we can ever see is our reflections, and it is not the real us. All too often we see our shortcomings, our failures, and the things that make us flawed. We don’t see that it is the size of our hearts that matter, and not the size of our jeans. We don’t see that what we think is ugly is actually what makes us unique. We don’t see that our bodies are absolutely incredible and life giving, but instead, we pick apart all the things we wish we could change. We don’t see that failures mean we took a chance. We don’t see that we would never say the hurtful things we say to ourselves to another person. We see the flaws. We are all flawed. Flaws are what make us human. Flaws are what make us irreplaceable. Flaws are what make life interesting. How boring would life be if everything were perfect 100% of the time? I can answer that. Incredibly. Flaws should be accepted. Flaws should be celebrated. I say applaud the flawed. Now, I know it’s easier said than done, and I am not going to all of a sudden love everything I struggle with, but it is something I want to actively work on. Since the reflection you see is not the real you, pretend to talk to someone else. Talk to your reflection the way you would talk to your younger sister, child, or your best friend. I bet none of us would say the negative, hurtful things we say to ourselves. We are flawed, but we are not ruined. We are human, and we deserve love. Start with yourself. Applaud the flawed. Always, Molly There is something endlessly endearing about people who find joy in the little things. The people who live with a grateful heart. The people who are constantly amazed by aspects of life that typically go unnoticed in today’s society. I am currently writing this thousands of miles in the air in a seat in the sky. It sounds crazy, right? It sounds incredible! As you have gathered, I am currently on a plane. However, people do not see the miraculousness that I, a human being, am currently flying through the air, while simultaneously writing a blog post, and not fearing for my life.
Louis C.K. had a standup bit that talked about how “everything is amazing, and no one is happy.” Well, that sounds pretty shitty, doesn’t it? Sure it does; however, there is some truth to it. He goes on to talk about aspects of life that are absolutely incredible, but we get boggled down with the little negative components that sometimes are there as well. Louis C.K. mentioned it, and it is what prompted this post: flying. Tonight after everyone was on the plane, and forty minutes after we were supposed to take off, we hadn’t moved an inch. In fact, the pilot told us that they had just started to load our luggage onto the plane. The man next to me was surely regretting the drinks he had before, because he couldn’t stop fidgeting to try and appease his aching bladder. This led me to start thinking that I had to pee. Knowing that I could convince myself that I, in fact, was about to pee my pants, I quickly returned to my book my mom gave me right before I left, The Bassoon King, by Rainn Wilson. Reading his tale of growing up nerdy, when nerdy was in no way a good thing, helped pass the time. Regardless, I was still questioning what was taking so long. I should have been halfway to Jacksonville by now, and I haven’t moved. There were two women behind me that kept talking about how delayed our flight was, and how it was crazy and upsetting, and how they could not believe the situation. They were frustrated, and me being a notorious eavesdropper, I was hearing their frustrations, and started feeling them myself. Again, I pushed my nose back into my book, and wished I could have attended the one performance that Rainn Wilson and his band, Collected Moss, had done. Nearly an hour after we were supposed to set off, we backed out of the gate, made our way to the runway and…got delayed for another fifteen minutes. But, after those fifteen minutes, we took to the sky and flew through the air. Flew through the air. Think about it. Think about the last time you flew on a plane. I am currently thousands of miles in the sky, barreling across America hundreds of miles per hour, am more stable than I am in a car, and here I was getting frustrated because it was taking longer than expected to load our luggage. Everything is amazing, and yet no one is happy. Father Mike brought up Louis C.K. and his bit and did a sermon on it, which I then listened to again to help me try to understand how amazing circumstances do not lead to happiness. Father Mike said, “We live ordinary lives because there is no wonder.” There is so much to be excited about in this world, but we barrel through it for the sake of our own agenda, we don’t get to sit back and enjoy it. There is no wonder that people are not captivated by life. No wonder people are not as happy as they could be. No wonder people are not grateful. No wonder we live ordinary lives. No wonder there is no wonder. God does not call us to be ordinary. God calls us to be extraordinary. He wants us to pursue a life we enjoy, are captivated by, and are in love with. God calls us to live a wonderful life. A life full of wonder. If we do, there we will find happiness. Albert Einstein broke the ways we can live into two categories: as if nothing is a miracle, and as if everything is a miracle. Glass half empty versus glass half full. Henry Miller said, “Don’t look for miracles. You yourself are the miracle.” The fact that you are living, breathing, and even existing is a miracle, because the fact of the matter is…you didn’t have to. Sounds harsh, but it is true. God picked you and put you on this earth, and that is a miracle in itself. He did not and will not ever need us. He chose us, and that’s pretty miraculous. Be thankful for the chance to live out a miracle, and be intentional about witnessing others in your life. Live with a grateful heart, and there will be no wonder why you are full of wonder. Now, let me be the first to say, obviously I am going to get frustrated again, I will be angry, I will be sad, I will be a whole range of emotions again that are not happy. Hey, I’m only human. However, in certain circumstances, take a step back and look at what is separating you from happiness, and question if it is worth your time, mind, or heart. Live intentionally, love unconditionally, give thanks without relenting, and wonder without ceasing. Always, Molly P.S. Now, I’m sitting here writing this while sipping a Bloody Kentucky (a Bloody Mary with whiskey instead of vodka), because the man who was eager to use the bathroom ordered one, and the steward (is that the correct term for a male counterpart to a stewardess?) said it was on him due to the delay. Hey, can’t complain about that one. Glass is literally half full. Three months ago, I moved over 1,000 miles away from home. The closest people in my life are scattered over the country in six different states, three different time zones, with up to 2,716 miles in between us. Six months ago, these same people were within a four-block radius. To say it has been an adjustment is an understatement. Thankfully, snail mail and Google Hangouts have came to the rescue and at times made the distance seem to be smaller.
Lately, I have been homesick. But, not necessarily for my home in St. Louis. Don’t get me wrong, I have been missing the good ole 314 area and my family like crazy, but I was gone from home for the past four years. I got used to not seeing my ‘rents all the time. Now, I am homesick from my second home in Kansas City: Rockhurst. I am Rock sick. I have a bell tower shaped hole in my heart, and the past few weeks I have really been feeling it. You see, I already knew this, but Rockhurst is not like most universities. Rockhurst became my home. The people I had the pleasure of meeting and seeing daily became my family. The people who challenged me in ways I never expected. The people who are my confidants, my support system, my best friends. The people I could depend on, laugh with, cry with, and the people who were always up for an adventure. These are my people. Rockhurst is the place where everyone knows everyone. Rockhurst is the place I would stop in my advisor’s office if I was ever feeling tired and could grab a cup of coffee from their never-ending coffee pot. Rockhurst is the place where I text one of the staff members when something really crazy happens in a show we both love. Rockhurst is the place where a professor once FaceTimed a student to see where he was when he wasn’t in class. Rockhurst is 10:10 mass where collectively we can come together during the week in case we need a little pick me up or a little help from the Big Guy to destress. Rockhurst is the place where tardiness was usually because you did not account stopping several times to talk with people making your less than five minute walk to class triple in length. Rockhurst is (or, was–still haven’t let that go) the place with the world’s best twisters. Rockhurst is where if you don’t lock yourself away on the third floor, the library means equal parts work and play. Rockhurst is the place where the president of the university attends every single event held on or off campus. Even on the day he was taking his vows to become a Jesuit and enter into the Society of Jesus. Now, if that doesn’t speak volumes, I don’t know what does. This is what Rockhurst is. Honestly though, how can I keep from singing? Selfishly, I wish everyone I love could be as close as we were those short six months ago. However, I am watching the next chapters unfold in their lives, and I could not be more proud. Sean and Becca are both blessing the world with their grace and compassion through JVC. Matt and Alan are giving their talents back teaching through ASC. Sara is using her creative talents both at work and to have fun taking classes at Second City. Lynsey is still in the trenches with me in grad school working on her doctorate. I could go on forever. We are all creating our own stories, and for right now, our stories are taking us to very different places. While I miss you all more than words can say, Father Greg Boyle reminds us that in this very minute, we are exactly where we are supposed to be. So, for God’s sake, don’t move. Now, here in Jacksonville, it is different. Not a bad different, but different nonetheless. I miss my Rockhurst bubble. I find myself being grateful that I was able to attend Rockhurst on a nearly daily basis in graduate school. I am utilizing what the university taught me through its curriculum, through its core values, through its faculty and staff, through my friendships, and through countless interactions that I didn’t even realize were teaching me daily. Also, in regards to Jacksonville, I really do love it here! I’m not living in the past of my Rockhurst days. Promise. I will always be intentional about living in the present. It’s just that lately, I’ve been missing the Nest a little extra. I don’t think the bell tower shaped hole will ever be gone from my heart, and I am okay with that. It is helping to give me an ugly heart. That’s the goal, remember. Also, I am thankful that I have something to miss that completely. However, I know that right now, Jacksonville is where my story is taking me. So, I have to remember: don’t move. Enjoy now. Be present. This is where I am supposed to be. And for all those still at Rockhurst, whether you are a freshman just starting your adventure or seniors about to enter your last semester, the Nest is where you are supposed to be right now. Do not wish time away, it flies fast enough without that. Do not take if for granted. And for God’s sake, don’t move. Always, Molly We’re all just trying to figure our stuff out. You are, too. That’s okay. If at first you don’t succeed… YOU’RE NORMAL. You don’t have to have it all figured out. You do need to know this: you are awesome and you always gotta treat people awesome. The world needs you, so carpe diem. That means seize the carpe. Or carpe the day. Seize the…just go do something today. Go out into the world. We need people like you. People who care. People who dream. People who are their own Beyonce. The world needs you. You got life ahead of you, live it. Go be awesome.— Kid President
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AuthorJust a twenty-something attempting to create the illusion that I have a clue what's going on... Archives
May 2017
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